Please Note

The purpose of all the articles posted on this, my blog, are to bring to your attention certain things that you may have experienced in you life. I hope that no one has been offended by any one article and you have learned something useful. I will be posting more articles in the near future. Thank you for reading them. Rev. Ronald L. Koch

Likes and Dislikes

Why is it that when a person asks another person a simple question that they seem to think that we're being nasty, or bitter?  We only want a simple answer to a simple question. No nastiness or bitterness or hatefulness involved.

Not long ago I gave a friend a proposal, and not knowing that he was not at home in order to give me an answer right away, I wrote him an email.  I asked them what happened, in my own way.  They wrote back saying "that they read my 'not so nice email' and was not happy with it".  It was never intended as a "not so nice email", and yet that is the way it was taken. Why?

When a person believe what other people say about us, they tend to believe what they were told, by the other person, rather than their own knowledge of us. People who no longer accept us as who we are, but interject into their beliefs something that they shouldn't, are in reality looking for excuses to no longer "like us" period.  They'd never admit it, I'm sure. I  believe this is so.  We can't out quests what goes on in another persons head or what their beliefs are or how they are influenced by others. We cannot even know what, if anything they really think about us, down deep inside them. We can only continue to do our "own thing", so to speak, and hope others "get it".  This is really not us being bitter or hateful, but us wanting to know what it is that was so bad. What did we do that was so wrong?

How many times in your life has this happened to you?  Many I'm sure.  Can anything be done about it? Provably not. If others take a disliking to us, it takes an act of God to change their minds.  This should never happen in the first place.

Some people say that we are friends. Then turn around and "put a knife in our back".  Why?  Here again is a question without an answer.  If we say we take personal responsibility for our own actions, then their is no reason for bitterness, hate or even nastiness in our dealings with others.  It is our responsibility to just let others be who and what they are without judging them. That is not to say that it can't happen, it does.  It is then up to us to try and do something about it, if we can.

I cannot make you my friend even if I have tried many times to. Sometimes our best intentions are just not enough or even understood and most likely never will. Especially when others don't understand us, or even want to, they judge us, often, wrongly.  And that's the end of it...

Are You Empathic?

This short article cannot begin to cover the vast extent of the subject on empathy. However, it will talk about what being an empath entails.

"Clairsentience is another way of saying "empathy".  This means to have the emotional feelings or inner knowing of events which are unknowable.  These empathic people are also called "sensitives".  Some clairsentients are extremely sensitive and may feel emotional highs and lows and even physical sensations that do not belong to them.  The trick then is discerning which moods are not your own and protecting yourself from unwanted receptivity, particularly in crowded areas or at emotionally laden events, such as funerals.  Many people are familiar with this skill from the Star Trek - The Next Generation show, where the ship's counselor, Deanna Troi, was known for her skills as an empath".

How many times have you been with another person and feel like you just want to cry, or run as fast as you can from their presents just to get away from their overwhelming  emotional state? How many times have you been talking to someone and had the feeling that they were being dishonest with you or just plain lying?  How often have you felt the underlying truth behind what a person was saying to you but didn't understand why they were not expressing it? Could it be that you are able to tune into the person in a way that you don't really understand?  Or, perhaps you get a sick feeling when you're around certain people, or feel their stress or physical pain.  Maybe you just think the other person just doesn't  understand you because you express your feeling openly.  You just can't hide what's going on inside you.  You're an empath.

A person who is empathic is highly sensitive to the feelings and intent of others.  They senses what is happening within a persons auric field long before that person feels any kind of distress or the on set of physical pain or illness.

An empath can't stand a person who constantly criticizes them.  It's not the criticism that is the problem, it's the underlying intent within the criticizer.  It's his/her supposed hidden internal grandiose that is the real problem, something that is wide open to the empath.

People who criticize others on a regular basis just can't understand why the person they are criticizing gets so upset with them.  It's because the criticizer is seen through the eyes of the empath and the empath just can't take what is constantly being constantly projected at them.

Most empaths don't even know they're empathic.  It seems that people and the whole world hates them, and they just don't understand why. They only know that when they are confronted with certain people or circumstances they get upset easily and can't wait to get away from it all.

Other people are open and honest and the empath feels very happy to be around them.

Knowing that you're empathic can go a long way in helping you to cope with other peoples emotions and ways of working.  It may not be easy to deal with, but just knowing that you're empathic helps. Knowing you're empathic also means that you can learn how to protect yourself from the extreme emotions and intent of others.

Empaths are special people.  They can spot when a person is in physical stress before that person shows any kind of symptoms. They feel within themselves the pain and suffering of others.  An empath can feel what another person is feeling often deeper than the person is actually feeling themselves. Why?

Empaths have a special gift from birth that is usually a mystery to them for many many years or even their entire life.  But once they understand the real source of their problem, they can learn how to use their gift for the great good of everyone they meet.  To help others understand themselves.  To develop their gift in a thousand ways, even as a psychic or medium or as a psychologist or counselor. An empath is able to use their gift to help a patient understand their problem(s) faster and easier and with greater clarity.

An empath is a clairsentient who feel the embedded emotions in people, objects and everything they touch and everything that is happening around them, even in the world.  A gift that can be used to change that which needs changing.  To know when things aren't going the way they should, or going all wrong long before other become aware that something is happening.

An empath needs to constantly protect themselves against the projected feelings and emotions of others in order to live a relatively good life in the presents of others.  A gift that is indeed special but at the same time difficult to control without training and understanding.

In days long past

In days long past when I was young, I took to the woods to find what no others could find. I searched here and there for weeks and found not what I search for.  “Why did you continue I was asked”, my reply was "it was expected of me." A walk in the woods always took me where I needed to go, the place where I had to be.  

Was it important for me to know where, maybe, but not always?  You see our soul always knows what is best for us. We only need to find out what that is because that is part of what life is all about – the searching.  The other part is to come to know the God within.

We often search for what others expect of us not knowing that we were really supposed to search for what was best for us.  Whether this is what we had in mind when we started, may or may not be what was intended.

Like so many searchers, we often go beyond are abilities. It doesn't matter what we're searching for, and we are never told what was really expected of us, what mattered was, we not knowing did what we should.

Going beyond all expectations is something that we can do. We only need to get started.  The question is what is it that we expect of our selves? Do we stand up to our own expectation? Or do we fall short?  Who is it that we really have to satisfy?  Is it really you, or you, or you?  Can’t I do what I want without criticism, or make something totally unexpected?  Like what you say?  Good question.  You see it doesn't matter what it is.  It is I who does it.  It is your place to simply watch and do nothing, even say nothing.

The big mistake people always make has to do with others.  We demand that others conform to our expectations or else.  Why?  They don't think or act like us.  They don't even look like us.  So why question another persons right to be who they are?  You and I are to live our lives in harmony with others by letting them be who and what they are. Make no mistakes here, they are who they are and cannot be anything else.

Can you agree with this? That is the real and only question.

Relationships

Friendship and a good relationship with special friends is very important to me as it is for many of you.  A friendly relationship with two or more other people is a great gift.  A gift that has many good things attached to it.

When we were young we played together as friends enjoying each other’s company.  We shared our toys and playthings with others, things that today we would not share with anyone.

When we were young we shared with others everything we had without question.  We trusted them explicitly knowing that they would treat our things with respect.  No broken toys... Life then was simple for us.  We didn't know the difference between trusting and not trusting others. It was all the same to us.  What happened?

Today we seem to have lost our trust in each other. We need to know others very well in order to know if we can trust then.  Today we sometimes look at each other as strangers.  Have we changed so much over the years that we no longer enjoy having fun together? Have we lost all trust in each other. I hope not.  It would not be good for any of us.  Life is filled with those things that we as individuals have to be concerned with, especially with others.

We need friends and we need the opportunity to engage in playful fun.  To party and have fun together.  Consult with each on things we may need a little advice on.

Togetherness with friends by having family softball games, go swimming or fishing together, or playing tennis.  Going to the park for a picnic or the fair.  We can even enjoy going to church, a civic gathering or even school.   Maybe we just want to sit together having a little quiet time playing checkers or some other board game.  Togetherness is a way of expressing our trust and love for our friends and others. We even make new friends when we are on vacation that can last for the rest of our life.

When we take personal responsibility for our actions, our thoughts, and ourselves we are able to express our trust and friendship in a very beautiful way.  We need to relearn how to trust each other as we did when we were children.  Trust that others will always be there for us and always be there to lend a helping hand. Friends never judge us, and never talk down to us in a real or imaginary way.  A friend understands us as being unique and special, someone you trust, love and know as special.

A husband and wife have a special relationship that start developing the day they meet.  It's an on going relationship that grows with time.  Friends an even trust each other with their very life.  A very special kind of love and friendship exist when a wife, who loves her husband so much that she desires to have his children,.  When a couple who has been married for 40 or 50 years is ask how they lived so long together, they often say "it wasn't easy but we made it work because we love each other".  Two people who are special loving friends who have stuck it out together for many years.  We need this between friends.  That love that is in a friendship that only time can make perfect.

Yes, friendships are indeed a special gift that two or more people can give each other. Something we all need.